eagle2001 write: As you and the love of your life are climbing the mountain to reach Gods riches and glory the love of your life decides to take a different path. But that path is dark & she stumbles & starts to slide down the mountain it's steep & slippery but you have a strong hold onto the rope of love. You start to pull her back to you, she gets back on her feet and as you continue to pull on the rope of love to guide her back to you there is resistance because she is not helping and she wants to try that other path again. This time the path gave out from under her, but the rope of love kept her from falling all the way down you have a tight hold of it you have strong anus big shoulders strong legs & the rope of love is a strong rope. Besides all of your strength you have a strong faith in the Creator who you now is right beside you. But the harder you pull the harder it gets. As time goes on all your muscle's begin to burn, but your tough you know you can bring the love of your life back to your side. You cant give up you wont give up. Your legs begin to shake so you get on the ground & dig your feet in but the weight is so heavy you begin to slide,your muscles burn more then you can bare but your not a quieter you cant let go you wont let go of the love of your life. The weight is so heavy you keep sliding down, down to the edge of the cliff. One foot goes over then the other, just before you go over you feel an ami around your waist holding you back & a voice that is strong but soft tells you to let go you can do no more. You listen to the voice with resistance. As the rope of love begins to slip through your hands (heart) it begins to bum more & more. The pain from your burning muscles starts to subside. As the rope of love continues to slip & burn your hands (heart) the pain is so great but you just cant let go all the way, So it continues to bum & bum. Finally the end of the rope of love goes through your hands (heart) & there is nothing more you can do. As the Creator helps you to your feet he tells you once again you have done all you can you can do no more. You can't help someone who does not want to be helped. The great pain you feel throughout your body will eventually go away,your bleeding hands (heart) will heal in time & I will help you, Just stay on the path that I have put you on -
Someone has to bare the weight. Odds weren't in my favor. Yet here I am, last man standing.
Wow CW: You may be the last man standing, bit there are friends standing beside you, and you have many friends.
Thank you all for what you have written. I am going thru a new period, a new beginning, and am having to stay at the top of my thoughts, and feelings as never before. Everything has an upside, and I am busy flipping to the upside. Moving, packing, lots of rain. So much up in the air and doing a lot of 'letting go'.
Great food for thought:What has been on this thread. How you doing Rev?
Life...too bad with some people and too good with some others...
there's no balance!
Life with me was very heavy in the past...I stard work when I was 18 years old.
My parents divorced when I was very young...
I grow up when I was young...and this is not good! With people with my same age I don't agree, because most of them for me are immature...and same thing for the girlfriends.
I'm generaly speaking of cuorse, I'm talking abuot my experiences!
lil_ride write: havfun writes: change the age to 52 and your message could have been written by me. Imagine being so naieve as I was about people all my life, and now trying toplay catchup!@ that lonely mountain top cabin sure seems an easier alternative sometimes!
I hear ya on that one!!! And would have to agree the cabin might be an easier alternative, but just a little time at the cabin reflecting on all around us is usually all we need to face the world with new insight, and outlook... I had to realize a lot of things at a young impressionable age. The fact that I had to accept the things I can't change, as well as the fact I can change how I'll allow events to effect me. I'm a very forgiving soul and some might say that's a short coming. I personally see it as an admirable asset.
true--i think the hardest person to forgive is ourselves--we are human--we accept other ppls shortfalls--but not our own--we are our harshest critics
in order to live to truley live we have to experience--our hearts will be filled with dings and dangs without them how can we truely appreciate the partner that will be there for us--they aren't perfect either so they may add to the dings and dangs we have
if when we reach heavens gate our hearts are without the dings and dangs we have existed not lived
yes we also need to learn to craddle our own souls--to tell ourselves that all is ok
change the age to 52 and your message could have been written by me. Imagine being so naieve as I was about people all my life, and now trying toplay catchup!@ that lonely mountain top cabin sure seems an easier alternative sometimes!
I hear ya on that one!!! And would have to agree the cabin might be an easier alternative, but just a little time at the cabin reflecting on all around us is usually all we need to face the world with new insight, and outlook...
I had to realize a lot of things at a young impressionable age. The fact that I had to accept the things I can't change, as well as the fact I can change how I'll allow events to effect me. I'm a very forgiving soul and some might say that's a short coming. I personally see it as an admirable asset.
stillme67 write: so revolutionarypassion, u started the thread, people posted, but nothing from u. were u just throwing the question out there for the hell of it or were u gonna share something too?
I threw the question out there for many reasons. I do enjoy reading other people's inputs on how monumentous events have effected their lives.
I guess since I had a recent monumentous event in my life, and I know how it has effected me, I just wanted to find out from my BK family & friends what has happened with them.
There has been so many, but of course the most memorable is the most recent.
I fell in love so fast and acted on it. I left everything I knew behind me in Ohio and left with my SUV packed to the hilt and headed out to Colorado. I wasn't there for barely over a month when I sensed a change....a distance building between us, and when I asked him about the possibility of someone else in his thoughts...I got "I love you, honey...we'll talk about it this weekend." Well, that weekend, my worse fears were confirmed...and not from him telling me. I found out on my own.
From that time on, I thought he did want to work things out, when in actuality he was working things out with his ex which was causing further distance between us, and caused such intense and violent fights. It ended horribly... Nothing I had wanted or expected.
Lessons learned: 1. Go with your suspicions and intuitions and say something right away. 2. Don't settle for an answer, like I did then, that didn't give a definate answer. 3. Don't take in consideration that the person is someone who "wouldn't do a thing like that...it's just not who they are". When someone gets found out for all their lies and the evidence is placed before them, you never know how they'll react. I.E. Even the most gentle and submissive creature will fight back when cornered.
I will carry these lessons with me for the rest of my life. I'm just trying to ensure within myself that they won't create such a narrow view of others in this world that I miss out on wonderful people because of them.
i am very sorry to hear that. life lessons are never easy and seem to get harder as we go along. i just hope the "violent fights" were not physical... the mental strains are hard enough to deal with as it is. but it sounds like you are already on your road to recovery. i just hope it's a short road for you.
mspyder write: Rev, the last 2 relationships of any lenght, they left me to be with another man. I can feel what you are saying. It was not much fun at all and each time has taken longer for me to get my self-esteem back. I think I may be ready to move on. Spyder
i think what we need to remember is ppl come into our lifes for a reason, season pr life
when we are in the mists of the hurts we can't go there and take it personally instead of that it is them not us--or this was how it was/is meant to be
we may also not know why--but if we don't heal self we keep getting into the same relationships with different faces--this is where time learning about one another comes into effect
you know insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting different results
we can't change others we can only change ourselves
Not only do most people go through life with blinders on, but many of us attach interpretation and meaning to that around us based solely on who we are. Meaning that how we were raised, what our belief system and values are, how we live our daily life and what our expectations are dictate how we react to a situation or person.
Living a "conscious" life - seeing it for what it is rather than how we think it is - is not an easy thing to do. We all have dozens of layers wrapped around us that distort what is truly around us.
I totally changed my way of life when I read "A Conscious Life: Cultivating the Seven Qualities of Authentic Adulthood" - it's not an easy read - I'm on my third reading - but it hit home for me. From there, I've moved over to reading Deepak Chopra's books.
I still have a long way to go to live a totally conscious life but, fortunately, I am one that wholeheartedly embraces knowledge, learning and life experiences.
For me, the best way to keep focused on being "conscious" is to remind myself that life has no meaning whatsoever except for what we each attach to it. We live in our heads - what I see and my interpretation will ALWAYS be different than anyone else.
I had a discussion about this with a friend of mine a while back, and he wrote this poem which pretty well sums up what I mean:
It's all in your head
Places you have been, places to see
Things that happened, things to do
Friends you lost, friends you have
Feelings you felt, feelings you have
Love you lost, love you feel
Misfortune and good fortune
Your past and your future
Broken dreams and future dreams
How the world sees you and you see the world
Who you are and who you will be
It's all in your head, so what do you see?
lil_ride write: The hardest lesson in my life would be to learn how to "trust" folks again. When I was 18 a horrendous event took place in my life that truly changed me forever. I'll stand back in a crowd, watch and listen. Yes, I'm guarded, but once I open up and invite a person (male or female)into my world of friendship, you become part of my "chosen family". I agree people aren't always what they seem to be, and we don't always want to see them for who they are for what ever reason we may have. I don't seem to have a problem with accepting folks for who they are, or being friendly to them. I just know I'm a lot more picky as to who I'd get close to due to my experiences in life. Strange how life molds us all.....
hea little. change the age to 52 and your message could have been written by me. Imagine being so naieve as I was about people all my life, and now trying toplay catchup!@ that lonely mountain top cabin sure seems an easier alternative sometimes!
revolutionarypassion write: What would you say has been the hardest lesson in life you have learned that has impacted you the most?
Two difficult words to understand in life - Trust and faith ! Not just in any closer relationships that ya have but also in 'real' friends ........... as each day passes we add another grain of wisdom to our pile, but those 'tiny little' grains are so verrrrrrrrry difficult to accumulate ............. just when we think we know everything something else happens to take the wind from yer sails ....... again !!!!!!!!!!
well saxon, my life is a now a pursuit of wisdom, and no, i havent accumulated much of it..its as if WISDOM were a big onion, and i am peeling it one layer at a time, and as i eat it, there are many tears. but...i am devouring this onion from the inside out, and i will never get to the end of it, cause this onion is actually the universe...dayum, im hungry, need a cheezburger...
the last words may not be as important as all the words you said over a lifetime. if someone goes and they know you loved them they still know it even if the last thing you said was not what you wish you said. Just because someone says angry things to me I know they still love me , they just might not know what to say at that moment to make it better and understanding that , that in itself can be loving someone.
Interesting reading...thanks for sharing everyone...Hugs...
I've been pondering this one for a few days. What has been the hardest lesson in my life? One that I still struggle with sometimes. My Dad & I got in an argument sometime after Father's Day in June, 1994 & with us both being stubborn Germans, we both wouldn't be the first to call each other on the p hone after that to talk. Well, on 9/9/94 was his & my stepmom's anniversary. I told myself that when I got home from work that night that I would call & wish them a happy & I would then talk with my Dad. Well? I got home from work & instead I got a p hone call from a woman who was a neighbor of theirs. She asked for Carla & I said this is her. She said, I have Alice here & she'd like to talk to you. She gets on the p hone & she tells me that my Dad is gone. I said where did he go? She said, no...he's gone. He's dead. He had walked down their driveway earlier that day to get the m ail & when he got back close to the house by his car...he collasped & had a heart attack & died. My stepmom had had a few strokes in earlier years & used a walker & couldn't move too quickly & she was standing by the kitchen window & she saw my Dad fall. By the time help got there, my Dad had already died. Here my 2 brothers & 1 sister all had the chance earlier in the day to call & talk to our Dad but I didn't.
So what lesson did I learn from this? A big one...
First of all, I just want to say that when I first started reading the forums and posts on BK, I read the name "Rev", I thought it was a reverend or something. Of course I learned that it was the legendary Revolutionary Passion who was called "Rev" for short.
Seems apropo then, that the REV starts this thread. I've been reading it, I have a story to tell.
Like most of you as it seems, we have been through many trials and tragedies. Been tested over and over. Some mention those you know who didn't make it through and have passed on, If we are reading and posting, we obviously made it this far.
I had many problems. But the one when I realized my life could change if I thought about things a different way was when I lost my Dad in 1983.
Our last conversation was an arguement. We yelled at each other and I was pizzed off at him because he didn't see things my way.
He passed from a heart ailment about a week later. I struggled for a long time, dealing with issues from other past traumas and this arguemant at the forefront.
To make a long story short, I learned to forgive first, then realized that I needed to learn to love, unconditionally and that I was the one that needed to ask for forgiveness.
There is quite a story about how this happened to be in my life, and I would like to tell it someday. Ask me if you really want to hear it. But for now, this realization changed my life forever and was a great part of healing for my own benefit and the betterment of those around me in my family and my world.
Thanks Rev, for the thread and the thought provoking it has provided.